I’ve been writing this blog for over a year now, possibly close to two, and yet still I don’t seem to able to shake off an audience. I mean seriously, who are you people? Have you not learnt? You’re not going to miss anything, if anything this blog has been getting worse, really, check out an earlier blog post, filled with vibrancy and joy, compared to now.

It’s like going from maternity to the morgue.

How do I know this?

Well…. Ermmm… I’m a geek and have been following you all. I installed google analytics on my site to see what people were interested and how many people read this shit.

Here’s what I learnt:

  • I have 2 seperate Iranian readers – one from Azarb&yjan-e-Sharq and the other from Tehran – despite having written no Iran focused articles.
  • My readers from Canada, USA, France and Finland spend more time on my site on average than UK readers: clearly they find me much more interesting.
  • My 5 polish readers spent less than 21 seconds cumulatively on my blog.
  • 26% of readers read an article on their phone or non-PC device. 67% of those use an Apple product to view it, which probably means i’m a pretentious arty twat.
  • 71% of my readers have visited my site once and decided that enough is enough and have never returned.  The remaining 29% are clearly idiots who don’t learn. 6% have been over 9 times and obviously need help…
  • The two most popular searches to find my site were #1 Jon Richardson and #2 Night Vision Goggles. So comedy fans and serial killers.
So, some facts there…
Night…